another crack.........and of course I slip through it

I'm sitting here....and I'm heartbroken. I came home yesterday thinking that this was all a bad dream.....

After everything Rudy left me last night....after six months....no fights no nothing...and I'm so confused. I'm lost. I just don't get it.

Nobody gets it......

I've never felt so beat down....so drained...so exhausted.....so done.

So you win God.

I give up.

I can't do it anymore.

I throw in the towel.