 | My New Years Resolution!!
Current mood:  optimistic
Category: Life So here it is...the start of a new year....and with the start of a new year I wanted to of course start the year off right...With a BLOG! lol Anyways my blog is about my New Years Resolution of course. It's always something that I mean to do and I usually say the same thing year after year...I'm going to lose x amount of weight....blah blah blah......this year I decdided not to use that same old stand by well because A)I've lost weight this year....and B) I wanted something that I know I can do and something that is going to help me in my dailiy life
So what is my resolution you may be asking.....but before we get to that let me tell you a lil background on me.....I am shy. One of the shyest people that you could ever meet. Now if you know me personally you know that when we first met chances are that you approached me, or someone introduced us, and the first time we met I probally didn't say more than ten words. I'm seriously that shy. I get nervous around new people, to the point sometimes that I feel like I'm going to have an anxiety attack. I realize that if you only know me from online that you won't believe this....but do. It's absolutely true. After I meet you one or two times though you'll be wishing for the time that I was quiet because once I get to know you I don't shut up much. lol The thing is that I want to be like that all the time. Not scared to say what I want. Not worried about meeting people. Okay with approaching a stranger and talking, with flirting with someone that I find attractive, and TELLING THEM I LIKE THEM! I'm tired of mis-opportunities.
Which brings us to the actual resolution.....I resolve to not be so shy, to be more assertive, and to approach anyone that I want to meet, talk to, or get to know. I resolve to be a new and improved Nicky in 2008. I feel like I can do this. I know I can. I just need a push once in awhile. A reminder if you will that I said this. lol I started down this path last night....I talked to everyone that I wanted to, people that I had never seen before. I just want to meet people. To put myself out there in the world. Ya know?
So at this point you may be asking me what brought this decision on...so let me tell you. I recently had a date....with a really amazing peson...total sweetheart...even bought me flowers. Now you might be wondering how this affected my resolution...so let me share with you, I don't think I'll get a call from this great person again. Why you may be asking....You're an amazing person yourself ur probally thinking (and yes I know I am lol) BUT I was with her and a group of her friends, that I had never met before, and all at once I froze up. It was like I couldn't talk............and I am sure that I made a sparkling first impression let me tell ya. I am sure they think that I'm like a snob or something or didn't like them, when in fact I thought they were all really nice and it wasn't anything that they did to make me feel that way. I simply couldn't speak. Or think. Or Breathe.
So like I said...it was time for a change. I can't believe that once again I blew a shot at being happy. And who knows if anything would have even come of it...but it would have been nice to have the chance. Blah. Anyways that isn't the only reason it's really only the catalyst. So there ya go. Not sure why I chose to share this tonight. But hey. It's what I do. lol |
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